THE BATTLE OF THE BODY AND AN INSTA-TROLL!

I have just embarked on yet another diet! Along with a million other people of course. As summer draws near (although you wouldn’t have guessed as the weather has been shite!) we all get in a panic about having to reveal our  bodies again. The bodies that have spent all winter covered up in leggings jeans and jumpers.

As the great unveiling takes place we all reel in horror as we scrutinise ourselves from head to toe in the mirror that almost seems to be laughing back at us. Peering closely we notice all the new additions to ourselves. The love handles, the rather rotund middle and the wobbly thighs and that’s just the front view! This is one time I am grateful that I don’t have eyes in the back of my head!

I do still go to they gym of course,  so I have some muscle tone it’s just such a shame that it’s buried under rather too much blubber. But it could be worse considering my age and I do try hard to keep what I’ve got where it should it be ! Gravity you Bastard! – get thee behind me! But god it’s hard work.

My confidence was rocked even further by some insulting remarks directed at me and my friends from an Instagram Troll!  This charming guy (although I’m not convinced it wasn’t really a woman behind the profile) started by saying “well your nothing special” in response to my previous blog! about Willy Pictures, and followed with “ I wouldn’t send you anything ”  I took no notice being use to getting plenty of stick whenever I do something on TV or for the newspapers.

But when he made another remark about a picture that included my darling daughters stating  “you are all past your sell-by dates”  I was furious! Insult me all you like but do not insult my precious offspring! So in full tigress mode and despite my better judgement I rounded on him telling him that we have a saying in the UK (I think he was from the US) ” That if you can’t say something nice then best to say nothing at all”.

This was a big mistake! He then spat out such a vitriolic attack on my lifestyle as a supposed Cougar that frankly it shook me a bit! He ranted on! message after message popping up on my page. He insulted me from every angle he could think of! Composing a well thought out and carefully aimed response that put him in his place in such a way he couldn’t fail to be affronted! I hit the send button.  I waited just long enough for it to be read and then before he could reply, I blocked him! I could almost feel his frustration and anger coming in vitriolic waves right at me!

But what surprised me was how effected I had been by the insults! Usually I just dismiss them out of hand and block the sender. Telling myself that I was being an idiot for even considering what this anonymous twat had to say I vowed never again to respond to such abuse, but just press the block button immediately.

Settling down in front of the TV with my lunch ( a lettuce leaf a tomato and a teaspoon of cottage cheese) I find myself watching the fabulous Loose Women. They are running a campaign to stamp out body shaming and reminding us all that we are not perfect and every body tells its own story!.  To hammer the point home the panel had a picture taken with all of them in their undies and swimwear with #MyBodyMyStory.

A variety of ages and all shapes and sizes I thought they looked Fantastic! But I’m sure they didn’t! We are all so programmed to think that anything less than airbrushed perfection just isn’t good enough and I was please they were making a stand. In order to support the cause they were asking viewers to change their Twitter profile to something they wouldn’t normally use,  like an undies or swimwear shot using their hashtag.

Right I thought if they can do it so can I and before I changed my mind I whipped off my dress and took a couple of underwear selfies. No! I didn’t rummage through my underwear draw looking for the matching set with all the lace that has never seen the light of day, I did it just as I was.

As I loaded the picture up to Twitter and Instagram I felt strangely empowered. I may not be perfect but I didn’t think I looked as bad as I had imagined. Well now my secret was out and up there for all the world to see!It’s a good job I blocked the Troll I daresay he would have pulled me and my body to pieces with his teeth!

Back on the diet front,  I have decided to try Slimming World this time round and signed up last week. I am busy loading my fridge with ‘Muller light yogurts’ and ‘fat free everything’ and the ‘Fry Light‘ is standing guard by the frying pan!  It’s going to be a bumpy ride but with holiday’s and Royal Ascot on the horizon needs must.

Of course burning more calories would help, but my favourite way of doing that has been sadly lacking in the last few months . Family commitments haven taken me out of the dating game for a while. But when you start eyeing up the Amazon delivery driver and licking your lips! you know it’s time to get back on the horse! London lock up your sons!!

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