Butlins is my happy place……..

There is nothing like a bit of girly bonding to make you forget your troubles and having a bit of good old-fashioned fun, lifts your spirits and makes it possible to cope with the shit that life throws at you.

Arriving at our very nice hotel after a stress free journey..we quickly unpack and then open the wine…. Sitting out on the balcony from which we can enjoy the sea views . We relax and unwind.  Chattering madly the three of us discuss the weeks ups and downs and await the arrival of the rest of the team.   It’s a mixed bunch not only age group wise but also made up of the marrieds and the singles.  One by one the girls arrive and after getting our party frocks on we all congregate in our room for pre-party drinks.  I had decided to drink my favorite cider the Henry Weston’s Vintage  variety which if drunk in quantity will knock your head off and has the habit of rendering you completely legless.  We order up some pizza which arrives quickly and is delicious but by now the wine and the cider have taken hold and im feeling suitable relaxed and not at all hungry.  I force a piece down but it’s not enough to soak up the Henrys..Heading out clip clopping into the Disco lift…do love the lift ..loud 70s music belting out it’s almost impossible not to dance all the way down..we spill out and into the main venue to watch the live bands and drink even more booze.

The place is heaving and it’s not long before we are dancing and chatting…its all very friendly and we are in high spirits and when the band strikes up we sing along so loudly we are all hoarse by the morning.  The cameras are clicking all the time and poses stuck with various groups of transient males all strutting their stuff.

Three sambuka’s later and I get a text on my phone from one of my TBS. Due to the demise of my Blackberry the day before ,T Mobile had sent me a new one  (But only after I had kicked up a fuss)as always not all my numbers had transferred so I had no idea who this was. He was saying he could do Monday evening..Hmm well yes I had the empty flat and was looking for a hot date and had sent out a few texts to see who was around.  Narrowing down the possibilities I asked who is this…It was the Doorman..from a few weeks ago…he had proved to be a bit flakey..(Theres a surprise) Deciding to take the ball by the horns I phone him..not even considering the time it was gone midnight or my total inability to string a sentence together.  I have no idea what was said it is a total blur but I imagine for him sober and at home it was not a pleasant experience..I always try hard not to send the drunken text…I hate that moment in the morning when you reach for your phone and realise that you have done it again..text Jo Fred Bill or John after you had told yourself it was their turn to text you and you were never ever contacting them again.  Mind you the Aussie used to love my late night missives..suggesting that he night like to come and ravage me. (note to self do not send those anymore ~Aussie is now living with GF!!!!) Anyway I’m sure I had burnt my bridges with the Doorman…staggering back through the door…I realise I’m in the wrong venue..where have the others gone?…Having gone outside to make the phone call and inhaling fresh air in between slurs I am now without doubt totally out of it!.

Spotting  the girls I manage to negotiate through the crowds and reach them..only to get myself into trouble by dancing with a guy that someone else had their eye on.  At this point disapproving daughter suggests that it’s time I went back to my room …being incapable of disagreeing I head for the hotel…up into the lift and into our room..well I must have done but have no idea how I found the hotel the lift or the room and certainly no recollection of doing it.  Disgraceful behaviour!!!. The next thing I remember is a banging on the door..I was asleep in the cabin room..leaping out of bed I open the door to see M swaying in front of me..where are the others ? she says slurring..I creep into the bedroom to see my two friends are soundo. Not here I mumble and realise that the room is swimming and I’m just as drunk as when I went to bed…M and I have a conversation of sorts and she sways up the corridor looking for her room…I flop back into the cabin passing out for the second time only to have her wake me up again 30 mins later…she had spent the time fruitlessly wandering up and down and banging on the wrong doors…grabbing my mobile I phone her roommate who comes to find her…its now nearly 4.30 am and I’m still drunk.

We regroup at breakfast shuffling slowly and wearing dark glasses trying to spoon elusive eggs and bacon onto our plates and having the usual post-mortem.  The sun is shining and determined to make the most of it six of us head for the front.  The rest stay in their rooms to sleep it off. After a nice walk a paddle in the sea and hot donuts and coffee we are feeling better. All except T who tries to put out a cigarette and misjudges the distance between the bench and drop to the beach and falls quite spectacularly onto the shale..landing on her side..much giggling and laughter later..we pick her up and go back inside the camp.  We then decide to go swimming…whizzing down the chutes and slides..play in the penny arcades..have a few games on the donkey derby and finish up in the new “Brian Turner” restaurant. It was only 5pm but the place was packed out and asking for a table for nine we get seated.  It doesn’t dawn on us until we are all around that table that we are not suitably dressed for such a place. Wet hair, joggers,  towels under our arms.  Oh well too late now..The service and food were both excellent and feeling a bit tired we retire to our rooms for a rest and to recoup before we don the bunnie outfits and do it all again.

We all have a great night..dancing and singing and flirting..our outfits attracting a fair bit of attention.  Some of it not so welcome..I found myself getting constantly caressed by a girl and having taking it in good part at first I had to  her warn her off .  I round it rather odd that she would be so fascinated by my backside..after all she has one of her own!!!.

There was a bit of bedroom hopping…but not in my room..I went to bed about 4.30 having had a great day..and now it was my birthday.

In the morning we awoke to find that we had  a visitor to room 137 after all. A huge seagull had taken residence on our balcony and attacked the left over pizza. It seemed unable to get enough of a run up to fly and was regurgitating food all over the floor. Enter jolly maintenance man armed with a towell..the bird ducked under the next balcony and then when the man went there he came back flapping his wings madly. Two hours later the distressed bird was still out there..enter two maintenance men armed with towells…having cornered the bird he was lifted above the rail and flew away.

I sat on the balcony opening my presents and cards in glorious autumn sunshine..watching the fairground rides and listening the loud music..and all you could hear was people laughing in all directions. Staying at Butlins is like going back to being a child again and very therapeutic.  The tales of the night before are discussed at length ..water is dispatched to rooms where some of the bunnies are rather poorly and then its time to go home…sadly. Still I do have my hot date to look forward to….Yum!.

0 Comments

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

CONTACT US

We're not around right now. But you can send us an email and we'll get back to you, asap.

Sending

©2017

Log in with your credentials

Forgot your details?