Too Much to do..and I’m on the Orgasm Diet…

A womans work is never done! never a truer word was spoken.  I have so many demands on my time my head is spinning..although gratefully not like Regan in ‘The Exorcist”…not yet anyway. But I sometimes feel pulled in so many directions I get in a complete state of anxiety…and my brain feels like a soggy sludgy mess. Information is given to me and I seem unable to process it or remember the simplest tasks.  I write a list and then another and another and then find that the list writing is stressing me out so I give up!.

Most woman of my age would blame their age..Not this woman!. I refuse to accept that my diminishing brains cells have anything to do with my state of inertia or that my momentary inability to cope is anything other than overload.  The HRT tends to keep everything working in Apple Pie order . Although don’t ask me to bake one right now!.  I just think that woman aspire to be in control and be seen as capable and caring and successful. It’s a bloody tall order and the media would have us believe that we can have it all.  We can all bake like Nigella,look like Elle Macpherson, dress like Posh and give Lord Sugar a run for his money. We are expected to be wonderful mothers and spend quality time with our children, win wife of the year competitions and be able to be an active member of the PTA. If friends have problems we drop everything to be supportive.

Our house is supposed to look like something Laurence Llewellyn Bowen designed and when we are not plumping up cushions with the smell of home-baked cakes wafting round the room we are at the gym honing and toning!.  Sex has to be on our to do list as well..the modern woman has to have an active and fulfilling sex life…if she is married then with her husband if not then with whoever  she can drag in off the streets..All boxes must be ticked!!!.

Is it any wonder that just occasionally we lose the plot ..usually in spectacular fashion.. woman these days drink and smoke more..the bar we set ourselves just gets higher and higher and is always out of reach.  Those who keep striving are patted on the back . Those that just give up are pitied and patronised.

Where are all the men in this I hear you ask..well they don’t have such high  expectations of themselves. The forager gatherers are still dragging behind us in  the coping stakes.  They aren’t expected to tick any boxes but usual like to create new ones for us to fill.  Not intentionally I might add but they look to us to fulfill their need for nurturing and woe betide us if we have nothing left to offer.  It’s the nature of the animal and they operate on a very different level to us multitasking woman.  So maybe we should give up all the other stuff and just stand by our man, or lay down next to him and tell the world to bugger off!.

Well  as I learnt to my cost that sort of devotion does not a happy marriage make. So what is the answer ? I have no idea but I will continue to keep my end up as best I can..wearing all my different heads..(back to the Excorcist again!). Well at least until it explodes leaving bits of me scattered to the wind.

On a  lighter note I read in the Daily Mail today that Orgasms make you slimmer. It’s all down to the release of a hormone into the blood stream that regulates the appetite centre.  If ever there was a reason for more sex then this must be it ..it’s a revelation. Of course it has nothing to do with the amount of calories you burn in order to achieve the Orgasm in the first place.  All that concentration and effort getting the position just right…the heavy breathing and moaning, the sweating and straining. Then there’s the  shouting and screaming…   because you are in the throes of the most amazing sensory pleasure ? Nope! it’s because  the guy in the bed with you moved at just the crucial moment Grrrrh!.. ah well just have to tick that box another night and now that we know  it makes you slimmer its a good reason to add it to your to do list..Funny I just checked and  it’s the only thing on mine!!.

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