I was first persuaded (by Chloe in my office) to set myself up on Facebook. I didn’t have a clue of how it would take over my life. That was over three years ago and I never imagined in a million years that I would be checking in everyday to see whats going on and to update every stage of my own life for the consumption of my “friends”.
I found it useful at first for keeping people informed about the various stages of separation from my philandering husband. The day he left I threw a Divorce party and invited everyone female I knew using Facebook and we had a blast that evening! Then as I started to date toyboys I would write things in code that only certain female friends got the gist of so they would be able to keep up with my ever-changing sex life. It saved a lot of time and texts.
My friends list grew and grew as more people joined and as it became more sophisticated so my use of it became more addictive. It was great for sharing photos and made those visits to Boots putting in your little black canister and coming back days later full of excited anticipation to giggle over your holiday snaps obsolete.
It was bought home to me this week how adding random people on Facebook can actually be a mistake. These so-called “Friends” that appear from nowhere and have decided to befriend you for reasons best known to themselves can be a bloody nuisance as I found out!
I made a random comment about Candidates being an unreliable bunch this week. Something I don’t usually do but it had been a frustrating week. Reliable temps deciding not to go back to long terms bookings and leaving us and the client high and dry! Arranged interviews that took us ages to get being un-arranged! Another temp had been caught repeatedly using the internet for personal use and not doing his work! and I had so many poor quality CVs coming through despite my fairly specific advertising that I wanted to scream.
I had advertised a fairly middle of the road job but you needed office experience of at least two years which I clearly stated. What did I get ? Two years in Clarks shoe shop, two years in a Fish and Chip shop and the crowning glory a Keeper at London Zoo. All these jobs had their merits and I’m sure these people are all hard-working and conscientious BUT if I have beaten off the opposition to get the vacancy on board and my client is paying me find them someone who can do the job then it’s more than my jobs worth to offer them people with an email stating that over used platitude” transferable skills”. If they are paying then we have to deliver.
Then of course you have the location issue. I have had CVs this week from Scotland,Ireland,Italy,Newcastle all offering to relocate and again clients just are not interested in getting involved in all that not unless the job is paying £50k plus. The recruitment business has always been like this! It’s either candidate driven or vacancy driven.In simple terms one minute we are besieged on all sides with CVs from good quality candidates and have hardly any vacancies to offer them (despite our best efforts to secure some ) or like now we have a number of workable jobs and the CVS just don’t meet our requirements.
So with it being the first week back having dealt with one problem after another I tweeted my frustration which then got posted on facebook. I got an immediate retort from this so-called “Friend” talking down to me in a patronising tone insinuating that I was being totally out-of-order to candidates and that I seemed like a “nice” and “affable woman” and he didnt get it. NICE AND AFFABLE ! dear god! someone get my rocking chair ready.
He then tried to sweeten the pill after I had shot him down by saying that I was “cool” and it wasnt personal!. He implied that if I only dealt with the lower end of the market then what did I expect!!!!. I realised that he must also work in the industry and he quoted with great pride his six years of experience and giving me a run through of how he does things and he”hoped” that I wasnt one of those greedy recruiters, judgemental pratt!
OMG! I felt the red mist rising behind my eyes, and he was obviously looking through his still in love with recruitment rose-tinted glasses. After twenty-six years in the business and having seen it good times and in bad I was totally affronted by his put down. He had already ruffled my feathers during the riots earlier in the year when safe up-country and with me home alone with rioters running up my street he tried to make light of it making stupid and ridiculous observations. I should have got rid of him then.
Had he really been a friend or acquaintance of mine he would have known that I don’t make harsh comments lightly. But he just chose it as an opportunity to try to wield some sort of superiority on the subject and I can only conclude that this guy is so far up his own arse that he is in danger of choking on his own balls ! if he has any! Deciding enough was enough I told him to do one and Defriended him! But it did make me think twice about adding people if not truly known to me.
I am an open book (otherwise I wouldnt blog! about my life ) so I don’t feel too threatened by people reading about what I’m up too. Most guys that add me spend their time trawling through my pictures and exciting themselves accordingly. There is one picture of mine well hidden in an old album where I unwittingly and with no intention am showing my knickers. It never fails to amaze me that they locate this particular snap. To me its a very unexciting and unflattering but to the male of the species it represents something entirely different.
But having been on National television more than once discussing my love of Toyboys quite openly and having to defend my position I’m not afraid of criticism and in fact have come to expect it. The day I appeared on “This Morning” early this year I received over 40 friend requests in two hours (mainly from boys/men) Another lady also blonde and called Gaynor Evans received another 50. It was hilarious and she took it in good part
Then of course the other useful side of Facebook is to check out other people. It’s the first thing we do when we meet someone is to check them out on FB. I don’t general add any of my Toyboys on my FB as I like to keep things separate but that doesn’t stop me from seeing if they are on there. I do have a few that im happy to share my innermost thoughts and pictures with but if you send a friend request and you are not added it’s a sure sign that they want to keep off the radar for whatever the reason. It doesn’t bother me and it amuses me no end that all my friends are added by my son on FB but I am not allowed to be on his page. They of course keep me posted on his antics in any event much to his annoyance
Anyway next time I get an unsolicited friend request I will be treating it with caution just in case the so-called “Friend” wants to put down my work ethics or to use my “knicker picture” as his screen saver!!!