I wait patiently for the buzzer to be answered and as I look around I realise that the studio is a building that used to be an old school and I am standing by an old brick sign that says “Boys” how appropriate!.  I clamber up the stairs and am made very welcome by the team of make-up artists and a photographer. Chatting madly we introduce ourselves and my make-up is removed…although I hang onto my false eyelashes with a grim determination. I like to wear a fair bit of slap and I know that bright studio lights can have a bad effect on too much of it ..casting shadows in places you didn’t think you had. So I bow to the superior knowledge of the lady before me.  That said I explain that I like more rather than less. Understated is not a word I am comfortable with. It’s all very relaxing and as im the first person there (There will be three of us in the pictures..a lady that’s been in a relationship with a younger man by 13 years for the last 27 years and a lady that is having her first toyboy relationship) I just lay back and enjoy it !. (A first for me!!!) The lady doing my make-up asks me about my Toyboys and am I seeing anyone. I laugh and say im usually seeing any two!. In between I explain about my ex and how this is divorce day and I begin to wonder what my newly to be  ex. is doing on this very special occasion.  My guess is acting as if he doesn’t give a “Norfuck” and probably shooting things dead with his big shotgun. 

My hair is under scrutiny next and as I wear it long and straight usually, I am wondering what they are going to do with it . Out come the hair straighteners and the word curls is mentioned . Hmmm not sure about curls not really me! I was worried that I might  look like “Bette Davies” in “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane”  (if you were born recently you will have to look the film up) But I give in gracefully and before I know it I have a head of soft curls and lots of height.  Squeezing into my lovely Jade Green dress that I have bought especially, I am taking through for the first round of photos.

I pose this way and that and then Cougar two arrives, a pretty bubbly blond ..younger than me. We make small talk and she gets ready and then I can relax until the group photos are taken.  The third Cougar is running late as she has featured on “This Morning”. I’m intrigued I wonder what she is on there for. Having been there myself I’m wondering if it’s another story about us older women on the prowl.  So I was somewhat taken back when she arrived about an hour later dressed in her full regalia.  Introducing myself and wondering what the robes are all about we get chatting. It turns out that Cougar3  is a Witch..yes a Witch a real proper bona-fide practising Witch . She had been on  “This Morning” discussing her family of Witches Etc. Well it was Halloween!. She was very interesting and she explained some of her beliefs to us and showed us some of her tools.  I really should have asked her to cast a spell on the  Ex-husband but then I guess “Horseface” had already done that !!. It was certainly proving to be an interesting Monday. 

Our Witch joined us for photos and we all got on really well. She was kind enough to tell us a few spells and one in particular that involves an Apple  I am  definitely going to give it a try. You have to use it to get your most heartfelt desire.  In my case that would be getting my book published.  So lets see if it works. At least positive thinking can’t hurt.

After various poses all together we are done. Changing back into our casual clothes Cougar 2 and I go off to the station together and on impulse go for a drink at Liverpool Street,in my favorite bar where I tend to conduct all my first dates. We chat for an hour or two before getting trains in opposite directions.

I had text a couple of my TBs to see if anyone was round to meet for a drink. Most of them live in or near London I got a couple of replies but being a Monday and short notice they were all working ..so home I went to don a Witches hat myself and entertain my granddaughter Matilda and the various trick or treaters that knocked at my front door.  Luckily I had made a batch of my spicy meatballs the day before so dinner was easy.

Once by myself I again pondered the events of the  day smiling secretively.  It had all been very interesting and exciting and a great way to  spend my last hours as a married woman.  Feeling the need to acknowledge that fact and as always wanting to have the last word. I text my newly formed  ex-husband these few well chosen words .  “How appropriate that our divorce should go through today..Halloween! A fitting end to a horror story!. ” Giggling I pressed send, tomorrow was his birthday I’m sure he would be celebrating big style !!.


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