I have been chirping on for years about my reasons for dating the younger man! It is the question I have been asked a million times over and over and I have answered it in a variety of ways! But one of the biggest and most honest answer is that quite simply men of my own age are just not interested in me!
At last the national press has agreed with the point I have been making, parrot fashion for years with the headline Revealed: Why Cougars love to pounce on toyboys! (Sunday Mail March 10th Roger Dobson)
Besides the usual comments that toyboys are more enthusiastic and attentive blah blah a scientific study no less has come to the conclusion that middle-age men prefer to date younger woman ( tell me something I didn’t already know)
Whilst this form of age- gap,dating now called very grandly and I quote ‘age-hypogamous intimate relationships’ Whilst the man in the role of older and the female the younger has been widely acknowledged and accepted by society at large , women in the same position have had to fight tooth and nail to be accepted as the Older person in the relationships.
We have been vilified and give the name Cougar which paints a picture of us as predatory females gobbling up innocent and unsuspecting toyboys on a regular basis. This of course is complete crap and not how it happens at all!
But now celebrities like Caroline Flack, Kate Beckinsale and Madonna who are wearing the name Cougar as a badge of honour! As do I! And not before time. With female equality battles constantly in the headlines surely we are entitled to take the same stance as men where age- gaps are concerned?
With older men arrogantly dismissing middle-aged woman as past it! and French author Yann Moir leading the way with his contemptuous comments that women in their 50’s are too old to love! ( Don’t get me started on that man!) We are left with little choice but to cast our nets in a younger pond!
When I found myself unwittingly single 10 years ago after the discovery of my husbands long affair with the woman who lived next door I was thrown into the unknown world of Internet dating! It was scary and confusing.Everything I had previously perceived as dating and relationships was turned on its head.
I discovered early on the men my own age where invariably still married or came with enough baggage to sink a battleship! I was bruised and battered and had zero confidence so any attention from men was a welcome distraction. No one was more surprised than me that it all came from guys younger enough to be my sons!
I soon realised that I wasn’t keen on looking for another serious relationship and began enjoying my freedom and playing the field. The toyboys I dated not only built up my confidence but made me feel whole again! They were kind and attentive, sexually athletic and brought a playful joy with them that made me feel alive.
But rarely was I ever hit on by men in my own age group and when I did get the odd opportunity I found their negativity and apathy a great turn off! The hot fit lively George Clooney types never even gave me the time of day having written me off as past my sell by date!
So it’s Hobson’s choice, not that I’m complaining, it has been a wild and wonderful ride and one that I’m still enjoying. We just need the rest of world to catch up and see that age is just a number and what men can do we can do better and with Knobs on!!
If you want to hear more of my story and how your too can turn ‘ Cougar’ or if your’e a ‘Toyboy’ looking for love, join me at the Dating Show Live in June! Irregardless of your Dating preferences it will be hotbed of Single People looking to Mingle. What have you got to lose ?